He who treads softly goes far. – Chinese Proverb
We all want others to agree with us. Then why do we tend to argue so much? How likely is the other person to agree with us if we try to convince them via an argument? Let’s listen deeply instead. And then if we have a point to make, use this Dale Carnegie technique: Start them off saying ‘Yes’. Ask questions that solicit an affirmative response. That will set the psychological stage for the other person to agree with us. This should be done without manipulation and in a genuine way of course…
14th Dale Carnegie Principle: Get the other person saying “yes, yes” immediately.
Here’s a story from the book:
Socrates, "the gadfly of Athens," was one of the greatest philosophers the world has ever known. He did something that only a handful of men in all history have been able to do: he sharply changed the whole course of human thought; and now, twenty-four
centuries after his death, he is honored as one of the wisest persuaders who ever influenced this wrangling world.
His method? Did he tell people they were wrong? Oh, no, not Socrates. He was far too adroit for that. His whole technique, now called the "Socratic method," was based upon getting a "yes, yes" response. He asked questions with which his opponent would have to agree. He kept on winning one admission after another until he had an armful of yeses. He kept on asking questions until finally, almost without realizing it, his opponents found themselves embracing a conclusion they would have bitterly denied a few minutes previously.
Daily Affirmation: Today I seek ‘Yeses’!