Tag Archives: happiness

How to really understand someone

You truly understand another when you see him free from your personal feeling toward him. Vernon Howard 

Can we really see another as they are? To do that we would have to do at least two things:

  1. See them for who they are right now: Just be with them and not dwell on any thoughts about them, their past and what they might have done to you (good or bad). Just be, with them, now. Experience them.
  2. Listen to them at all levels: Listen to them so there’s no chatter in your mind while you listen and ensure that you’re not compiling your response to them, while they talk :)! Can you hear the flutter in their voice, the subtle nuances, the pain or joy? Can you notice their body language, facial expressions and what might lie under these expressions? Can you sense their being, their motive, their desires? All of this lies just under the words they speak. So listen deeply!

Meditation Tip #1 will help here!

Reference: The 3 levels of listening (Co-active Coaching)

Recommendation: The Power of Now by Eckart Tolle

Connecting with your deep self

In the attitude of silence the soul finds the path in a clearer light, and what is elusive and deceptive resolves itself into crystal clearness.Mahatma Gandhi

Imagine entering your bedroom, shutting the door behind you to the day’s worries, the hustle and the noise. You are now feeling very calm and settled. Next you sit (or lie) down and settle into a quiet repose. You now experience a peace and joy that’s impossible to describe to anyone else!


This is a good description of what Meditation/Stillness feels like. It’s something you can practice even beyond the confines of your private retreat.


Meditation Tips: Below is a first step towards learning how to practice stillness. About once a week I’ll be sharing a new tip, the series will guide you into meditating like a pro!


Meditation Tip #1: Try this. Notice the palm of your hand. Just experience it for what it is, don’t create a thought about it. Now put your attention on your breath and just experience it. Breathe in/out normally.

Most of us are lost in the inner chatter of our mind making up thoughts about everyone and everything. As you notice your body you enter the present moment and it stays that way until your mind manufactures a thought about the experience.

Now all day try to recreate moments like these, become present by noticing your body/breath and don’t think about it, just experience it.

This is the first step (and actually the last….tell you more later) towards stillness, peace and calm!!

Recommendation: Gateways to Now by Eckhart Tolle

A unified you!

Be gentle with yourself, learn to love yourself, to forgive yourself, for only as we have the right attitude toward ourselves can we have the right attitude toward others. – Wilfred Peterson

At the deepest level, how you are with yourself can’t be very different from how you are with others. If it is different then you’re creating a disjointed you; in other words you create a dysfunctional you, a self that’s conflicted about how to relate to everyone out there. A self that is confused.

The way out is to be honest with yourself. What does honesty have to do with anything you might ask? We must become aware of what we think of our own selves, as much as what we think of others. The two are inseparable.

So start by being gentle and loving with yourself, watch what you say to yourself or about yourself, notice this all day. Don’t second guess yourself, don’t short change yourself. And then if you’re being honest you’ll automatically be like that with everyone else.

You will start creating a unified you!


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Recommendation: Nurture the Spirit

Improve your life on every front!

The greatest discovery of my generation is that a human being can alter his life by altering his attitudes of mind. – William James (1842 – 1910)

Which is why our thoughts, all our thoughts are super important. If you frown upon someone’s antics or scowl at a bad driver, whose life are you affecting? Instead notice your reaction, that’s the key. Notice and alter, become aware and change, this ought to be our daily motto!

Our thoughts, especially the persistent ones, shape our day and eventually our lives. So choose the thoughts that work to your advantage, alter your attitude and notice the miracle that you create! Zig Zagler once said if someone asks you how you’re doing, don’t just say ‘Great’, ‘Ok’ or ‘Could be better’, instead say something like: “Feeling great and working on feeling FANTASTIC!!”


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Discuss this article and share your opinion.

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Recommendation: Create the life you want

Why spiritual progress is necessary

The highest happiness is indissolubly linked with spiritual progress. Spiritual growth yields lasting joy, peace which passes all understanding.The Urantia Papers

We all seek happiness and according to this quote the highest level of happiness is only possible when we make spiritual progress. The reason it makes sense is that at a very deep level the spiritual (What does spiritual mean anyway?) is what really matters. What’s left when our material largess goes away? What’s left when we die? What is it that we can truly take with us into the beyond? Our only true belongings are relationships and happy experiences we have with people around us. Continue reading Why spiritual progress is necessary